You know that your spouse wants to get a divorce, but you’re not keen on it. You want to try to make your marriage work.

As a result, you’ve been digging in your heels and refusing to sign any kind of document related to your divorce. You want to go through counseling first and to try to stay together. What should you do?

Can you stop your spouse from divorcing you?

You should realize that you don’t get the final say in this matter. Whether you fight the divorce or do your best to negotiate, the outcome will be the same: Your marriage will end if your spouse decides to divorce you. Instead of fighting it, it’s worth being respectful and responsible. It makes you look better to the court and will make the entire process easier.

It’s a better use of your time to talk to your attorney about what you’d like to get out of your marital assets. For example, if you and your spouse share a home, it may be worth talking about how you’d like to divide its value after it’s sold or discussing who should retain the property.

Though you cannot force your spouse to stay with you, it is possible to talk to them about going through marriage counseling before you divorce. They may agree to this just to satisfy you or to make sure you understand that the divorce is the only thing that will be satisfactory. If counseling does happen to work and you find that you want to try to stay married, you and your spouse can always stop the divorce before it’s finalized.